Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Soft Core

My neighbourhood has recently become dotted with these punchey vending machine games things that have replaced the crane candy grab and slidey platform game things that replaced the old timey yellow crane dollar store sing a song grabby game machine thingies.

You know what I mean, right?

The new punchey vending machine game things are high tech looking neon lit boop-dee-boo happy la-la tune things.

*Excuse me a moment* "GAM-BEH! ONE SHOT!" *CLINK*

Where was I? *Hic!*

The prizes offered were these little animated cartooney things. You put the in the sunlight and they waggle their heads and maybe their feet and they also sing a happy song tell the time hold your spare change do nothing else. Their cute factor is engaging for about five minutes, but then they're fairly boring. I know this because I stupidly threw out my television when I won at the punchey vending machine, figuring I'd have all the viewing entertainment I'd need with Doraemon here:

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Turns out, not so much. I keep violently shaking him, "DO SOMETHING ELSE!" But, he just smiles at me and wags his head and feet back and forth.

I guess the neighbourhood kids complained to the vending machine makers. In this age of computers and game-boys and cellphones, I imagine the solar powered bobble head animated character things aren't cutting the mustard. So there have been some new additions in the machines to please the kiddies:

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Soft core pr0n anime dolls! Yeeeee haw!
(Money Box! Cherries! Bwa ha ha ha ha!)

They come in a variety of poses, and don't even move in the sunlight, but still - they're TAKING OFF THEIR CLOTHES!

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Can't....look....away!

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I wonder what they'll put in the machines next?

2 comments:

Foreigner Joy said...

This makes me realize that I should check the machines around my neighborhood.

Why am I here??? said...

oh my........haven't seen anything like this in my neighbourhood yet, but I'm on the lookout now!