Like a Dream

I just wish there was a way that I could smash my head against the keyboard and it would somehow form intelligible sentences expressing what's up. I promised to update on what's been going on, but I did so assuming that I was going to be able to stay awake to finish off a single post. Jeeze Louise, my sleeping is all mental. The weekend before last, when I was at home with the flu, I decided on that cold grey Saturday afternoon that I would have a wee nap. So, I curled up under the blankets with Kami the cat at about 1:15 and drifted off. When I woke up, I squinted at the clock beside my head and it read 2:30 which was fair enough, but I was so very confused. Outside my window it was pitch black. I thought maybe there was a terrible, I don't know? Storm? And then I saw the moon. My cellphone rang just then and I had to ask my boyfriend calling what day it was. Technically it was Sunday, 2:30 in the morning, and I'd been asleep for over 12 hours.

I had a similar problem Monday morning when I woke up at 2:30 in the afternoon. I had slept right through TWO alarms. Since I got shingles I've been setting my normal alarm and my cellphone alarm for 5 minutes later. In over five years I had NEVER not heard my alarm ring, and suddenly within the first two weeks of getting sick I'd slept through it twice. Luckily I'd woken up just a few minutes late, each time with just enough minutes to stick something in my pie-hole, jump into the shower and then into clothes and rush out the door. I started setting the cell alarm for back-up.

So, a week ago Monday I'd finally managed to somehow not hear both of my alarms. I had to call work and tell The Princess I was going to be late because my first class of the day was starting in about 30 seconds. The Princess was understandably unimpressed. I'd already missed work the previous Thursday and Friday with the flu, and now I was screwing her over again - requiring her to cover my first thirty minute class. She gave me some attitude about it, and because I am an asshole I served her up a triple serving of attitude right back.

The thing is I absolutely HATE being late for work. It throws my whole day off, and I don't like arriving to work feeling frantic and unprepared. So, I was already pissed off at having to call in late that Monday. I understand The Princess being ticked off as well, but really, what's the point in that? I didn't purposefully not hear my alarms. I could not get in my time machine and wake up two hours earlier. I apologized in earnest - but when she started in on me I snapped right back. Charming.

A few minutes later the hospital called to tell me I didn't have H1N1. I had figured as much. Except for the fatigue, I had started feeling a lot better by Friday evening. The Princess and I spent most of monday pretending the other didn't exist. I finally broke the silent tension by asking her something about one of my classes. She left a post-it note on my desk before she left, thanking me for speaking first. she wrote that she didn't know how or what to say to me.

Sleep stalks me these days, and he's no gentleman. He doesn't gently tap me on the shoulder and inquire "Would Miss be interested in a little nap?" No. He pounces on me and smothers me with a dirty old rag soaked in whatever concoction they use in action movies to knock the good guy out just as he's solved the mystery. I wake up groggy and confused, often in some chair, with a stiff neck and drool running out from the side of my mouth. I'm all-round charming these days.

So here's another update that doesn't really update anything. BUT!! I'm going to continue typing after I hit publish on this sucker, and providing I don't slip into unconsciousness, there will be another post,....ummmm....post-haste.