Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Miss Me?

Well, now you've got to KISS ME!

I'm back. It took 4 plane rides and about 41 hours in total, but I made it! What a trip, man. Actually, everything was going very smoothly - my lay-overs were shorter than on the trip over and it looked like I was going to make good time, until we sat for FOUR hours on the tarmac at Narita Airport with the LYING PILOT announcing that "It'll just be a little bit longer, folks, and then we're off," every few minutes. I'd doze off and then awake to find us still on the ground, and then rage and frustration would make me all sleepy and I'd doze off and then awake and fume some more. Finally Lying-Pilot-Man conceded that we weren't going anywhere in that there plane, so they turned off the air conditioner and made us wait about forty more minutes. I think it was some sort of NorthWest Air sponsored psychological experiment. I kept expecting the flight attendants to come around and poke us with sticks while holding bottles of water just out of our reach. Un-freaking-believable.

Finally we were corralled back into the now empty airport and eventually herded to Immigration and then packed into 3 buses which drove us to a hotel downtown near Tokyo Station. Another hour. I'd (again) missed the 2nd feeding on the overseas flight and I was starving. I heard many other passengers complain about being hungry as well, but the airline was kind enough to pass out a little lunchbox before we boarded the bus. Inside was a stale bun with a single slice of mystery meat, a sad looking croissant, and a small cookie. I feared if I ate that crap the spike in my blood sugar might lull me into a coma, so I passed. The Airline Reps who distributed that junk out were lucky the bus was already moving away from the airport, or I would have wadded everything up and lobbed it at their heads.

We got to the hotel just before 1am, and had 4 hours to sleep in our clothes before we had to board the bus back to try it all over again. Success. And $250 off my next flight, so I guess it's not SO bad! I arrived in Incheon to discover the next bus to my city wasn't leaving for four and a half hours, so I called my boss to tell her it'd be ten hours before I was home, so it was doubtful I'd be able to work.

As it turns out, I looked into a flight instead of the bus, and bingo bongo, shuttled over to Gimpo and caught a forty minute plane ride followed by a thirty minute cab ride home and VOILA! (I perhaps should have gone to work, but oh-well. Not gonna happen today!)

I'm back! Kiss me!

Let me tell you, though, I wasn't prepared for the STENCH that greeted me when I opened my apartment door. I was so relieved someone was looking after Kamikaze, I didn't spend too much time thinking he'd do a shitty job. But he did.

It's not a difficult task:
Feed Cat.
Clean Litter Box.
Change Cat Water.

He fed the cat, but all dry food- ignoring the wet food I'd stocked up on before I left. Kamikaze's main diet is wet food. No wonder he had diarrhea. He was covered in it and there was spots of shit all over my apartment. His bum is still poo-coated right now, and apparently very uncomfortable as he won't let me touch it. Poor kitty.

He didn't clean the litter box. I scooped the whole bottom half of it which was clumped up with piss. I'd venture a guess that this was a good part of why Kamikaze used my BED as a litter box. Two comforters and a sheet, right down to the mattress, thanks-a-lot-cat. My apartment was 36 degrees when I got in. Hot cat stink. Lovely.

Kamikaze's huge water dish was almost empty. It's very deep and I doubt he could maneuver his head into it to get a drink.

I got the guy an expensive silver bracelet for taking care of Kamikaze. He said he wouldn't accept payment, and he's always admiring my silver. His sister-in-law thought a bracelet was a good idea. Right now I'm considering keeping it for myself and giving him a good kick in the nuts instead.

I'm tired. My air conditioner is seemingly out of Freon and it's hot here. I'll write more about my vacation, but let me tell you that after the first four days which were brutally hot and humid, the weather was OUTSTANDING. As a matter of fact, for about three or four days the temperature went down to about 10 degrees at night. And it was about 25 and sunny during the day.

Sounds good, eh?

I'm going to put myself down on my pee-soaked mattress for a nap. Tomorrow I'll go to school smelling like a bag-lady. How have you been?


Anonymous said...

Good to read your blog again....

Sorry about the "situation" with Kamikaze...a good kick to the nuts sounds about right.!


John McCrarey said...

Welcome home! You were missed.

It sounds like the Kami-cat had an ordeal worse than yours. Glad you are both safe.

Nomad said...

Welcome back, Jenn.

Jelly said...

Hey Chris, When are you coming to Korea? Thanks for the welcome everyone!

Bonnie Loves Cats =^..^= said...

Hi Jelly,
I missed you and Kamikaze. Was it all worth it now that the vacation is over? Poor Kamikaze. I feel really bad for him. I have cat sat for weeks for people - having them say their cats looked better than before they left them. I wonder how that man would feel if he were treated that way? Don't give him a gift - sell it and use it for Kamikaze. This week's WCB #62 is being hosted by Heather at
Glad you are home and hope to see pictures of Kamikaze.
Bonnie in Virginia

SweetSarahJ said...

Ahh! I would FREAK OUT if Tiggy was in that situation... poor Kamikaze. He doesn't desrve the gift!

Jelly said...

Thank you, Bonnie, for letting me know! Hi Sweet Sarah!
Yah- I've been thinking about poor Kamikaze's caretaker. I haven't seen him, as he went to Seoul the day I arrived back- but we're supposed to meet up tomorrow. I don't think he MEANT to do a shitty job, he just didn't LISTEN to the instructions, and he's never cared for an animal before.
I'm trying to be cool about it, but I will tell him what a shitty job he did.
Funny thing is I think he likes me, so I can't understand it. I wasn't impressed.