Friday, July 06, 2007

Boo. Friggin'. Hoo.

Have you ever noticed. The way Tyra Banks. Talks. In. Short. Staccato. Sentences.?
Especially when she's. Trying to. Make. A. Point.
I can't watch her talk show, because it's laaaaaame. And the way she speaks. Really. Bugs. Me.

But occasionally I watch America's Next Top Model. Perhaps because she's not in any given episode all that much. And, you know, it's, like, "OhmyGod! Who's going to BE America's. Next. Top. Model?"

So anyhow, this week they're airing Season 7 here and the five remaining girls are in Barcelona. Tyra sits them down to have. A. Talk. She's been in the bidness fo' years, so you know she's full of sage advice for these young hopefulls. She tells them that the modelling industry is hard, so hard! It's probably one of "the toughest industries."

"If you're not a great actor, you can go to an acting coach and improve. If someone tells you you're sometimes singing off key, you can get voice lessons. But if a client says 'I just don't like her look,' what are you going to do? You're still YOU!"

Oh Tyra! How true! How very very very true! It is tough to be a model.

Orrrrr,...wait a minute! You could go to a gym. And for a massage. And then a plastic surgeon's office. Lipo, Botox, Lift, Fat-lips, Boob-job. Heal up at a spa. And then head to a beauty salon and have your colours done and a gorgeous haircut. And hire someone to do your makeup. And get a fan to blow your hair around luxuriously while a professional photographer snaps your pictures. Then they'll touch it up and airbrush the shit out of it.

But, yah. At the end of the day, you're still just you.
Poor little model!


Michael said...

You're co-worker is out for a week for what probably is a 30 minute out-patient procedure to remove a third (and most likely HAIRY third nipple) and you much time for your car wreck?

sher said...

I also like to watch this show and roll my eyes and so forth. But, it's addictive.

Scott said...

Thanks to you I now hate Tyra Banks and hopes she gets an incurable skin disease.

I hope you are happy with yourself.

Bonnie Loves Cats =^..^= said...

Hi Jelly,
With so little good TV to choice from, at least Tyra is better than Maury's "You are not the father!" Sure hope that woman finds out who is the father of her baby. I think she has gone round 17 x now.
Anyway, I would love to see Kamikaze this weekend. Your friend Sher and Upsie are hosting WCB #109. We are in the middle of a heatwave here. Upsie has some good advice for staying cool. Check it out over at What Did You Eat?