Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Burning Up

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I'm not the most patient person by any means. I try. I endeavour to keep a calm and controlled face even when my inner self is rolling around the floor of my brain throwing a terrific tantrum, screaming and pulling its hair out. I have even more trouble with patience when I'm really tired, or really hot. So teaching LOUD children in 28 degree classrooms is messing with my mind. What I might normally think is kind of endearing, I'm finding to be terribly annoying.
"Yes, Sook-Jae, we all know you have a dramatic flair, but do you need to perform a couple Shakespearian acts before you answer the question? Just ANSWER IT, already. The whole class is looking at you. I know it pains you to have them turn away,...but release us! I beg you! And STOP BREATHING, already!"

Things just seem to be falling apart round here. My camera showed its first sign of trouble today, with half of the screen going very dark. The building I work in smells like a urinal. I've broken 3 dishes since last Friday, not to mention my PC, and I didn't get to have a massage last night because of a screw-up. The reservation was somehow made at the dermatologist beside the massage place. (???) If I had any energy, I might sulk, but as it is I can't be bothered.

This morning, the idiot who was supposed to show up yesterday to check something on my gas meter, started ringing my doorbell and pounding on my door, like she was on fire on the other side of it. I growled and started to climb out of bed, until I heard her turning the door knob back and forth, trying to get into my apartment. I HATE that habit here. What if I'd forgotten to lock my door, as I've done plenty of times before, and she walked in on my naked ass? So I muttered "%@$#% you, cuckoo," and flipped back into bed while she continued trying to smash my door in.

And I'll just say this because I'm on a roll, but hanging out with my co-workers after the missed massage appointment last night made me wonder if they're kind of retarded. Especially Sunny. We went for some dinner and a bit of a shop. Hey,...peeps in Korea who watch TV,...have you ever seen those Korean food infomercials and they keep going back to a family enjoying said food around a table or on a picnic or whatever? The actors seem like with every bite they take, they have just eaten the most delicious thing on the planet. They widen their eyes and nod enthusiastically to each other. I suppose that's the way it's supposed to be, to try and sell their stuff- but their reactions are just so OTT, it's hard not to retch!

Well that's what dinner was like last night.
Much sqealing. Many, "MMMMMMMM's!" and "Oh, my GOD's!!" There was seat dancing. There was even some triumphant holding-up-of-the-food so we could all bask in it's deliciousness. I wondered when the door to the kitchen was going to open and reveal the misty glorious glowing of the Angels who had surely cooked our meal.

Then Sunny and I went shopping where she liked to walk behind me and tr to jam the cart up my ass. I was again just amazed at how terrible her English is. Not only is her grammar messed up and her vocabulary very limited, but her pronunciation is so garbled, it sounds like she's still carrying around some of that delicious dinner in her cheeks, all squirrelish, like. I have a really really hard time understanding her. And she almost never knows what the hell I'm talking about, though she pretends she does, which irritates me further. I have to try really hard not to regress to caveman speak. "Me. You. Shopping. Go."

I'd just about had it when she answered, "Would you like something to drink?" (while pointing at a cooler full of drinks) with "You get. I drink your-suh."
Uhhhhhhh, what? It's like that now? Are we a couple?

Today, the heat and my impatience built even more. As I left my cool apartment and walked into the sauna that is outside, I looked up in the distance toward angry black clouds approaching from the east. "Yah," I commanded them. "You rain it up, jerkys." About an hour ago it turned almost dark as night and the skies finally opened up and it just poured. We haven't had rain in days. Now, Sunny is whimpering and whining that the thunder is so scary! But I like it!
I just hope we'd get just a bit of relief from the heat. And in turn I'd get some relief from my grouchiness!

**UPDATE** Just so you know, the rain was hard but short lived. It had the same effect as pouring water on the stones in a sauna. I was SOAKED by the time I got home, and there wasn't a raindrop in sight! And, my co-workers are actually pretty nice, I'm just mean.


Anonymous said...

Like a breath of fresh-air. Good reading a nicely lengthy post Jen.

Long live "Two Shoes"!

Anonymous said...

nicely?? seriously...I'm retarded now....maybe Sunny and I can make a go of it?

Jelly said...

Ha ha Anon2,...she is single. Want her #? (Sorry to have retardified you.)

TY Anon1, thanks for stopping by!

Bohemian in Korea said...

ROFLMAO! I could picture the dinner in my mind. I spewed whiskey all over my computer screen. Great post! Nice to see such a long post! It reassures us that "I Got Two Shoes" is off death row.