Friday, March 03, 2006

Whoring Myself Out

Before I offer to do anything, I should make sure I know all the details, especially here, where plans seem to always happen at the last minute, or all the specifics aren't mentioned until then.

A new big chain English school opened at the beginning of February and it's been sucking a few of our students away. Also, the new school year for ALL students commenced today, and so some kids have had their schedules shifted for the 100 other after-school activities they have to attend, and they can't mesh their new timetables with classes at our school. Today we had 7 less students than we did on Tuesday.

Anyhow, I agreed to go stand outside one of the two elementary schools here in town "before (our) school" tomorrow morning, passing out pamphlets and getting attacked by the kids and the mommies' curious stares. I even said I might wear a skirt and a little makeup. This was, of course, before I was told today that I was to report to duty at 8:00am.
HUH?
But, like, I only go to bed a couple hours before 8:00am. (My first class doesn't start until 2:00pm.)

My boss showed me the uniform she has "prepared" for me for tomorrow. Silly white cotton gloves. This is the uniform of the working person outside. It states, "Hey man, I'm not just standing around here, I'm on the job." It makes me think of parking attendants with their crazy hand dances. If you've ever been to Korea or Japan, you'll know what I'm talking about.

I told my boss that I have my own perfectly good red fuzzy mittens.
I'm going to bring my make-up bag tomorrow, and I swear, if I'm forced to wear those gloves I'm going to don a mime face and go all out.
Frankly, I wish I had one of those giant mascot costumes to wear. That way, no one would know I was crossing my eyes, sticking out my tongue, and giving everyone the finger.
8:00am. Hmph. I should have been in bed at least 2 and a half hours ago already.
'Night.

2 comments:

It's Me, Maven... said...

This post makes me wonder whatever the hell happened to Shields and Yarnell?

John McCrarey said...

Now, the headline to this post is certainly an attention grabber!

Just goes to prove that no good deed goes unpunished. As someone who starts work everday at 0800, I empathize. The day after pool or dart league is always rough.

Good luck!